Tag Archives: jealousy

Journey of a black heart

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Journey of my heart
Cruel and toxic broken part
Black heart poison dart


My self inflicted trauma is become a deep dark relentless melancholy. I fall dizzyingly into omnipresent guilt. With you I became a madman without you nothing no one. 

Your pain my journey of meaninglessness. An ever increasing  blank space of loneliness my destination. I steadily fade from the light until I am no longer visible at all. My self destruction. 

I could not save myself even if I wanted to. I descend to my end. I spiral into a cycle of self loathing and misery. I am left ever alone in the company only of justifiable self contempt and vitriolic spite.  

My own worst enemy. Your worst enemy. Me. 

I will never recover from what I did to you. In my heart only jealousy. In my possessiveness only violence. A masquerade of love. 

My black heart to blind to see. A journey to your death was always a journey to my death.
Now willingly. 


Approaching my death
Is no natural cycle
I made this happen

A response to Frank’s d”Verse Haibun prompt “journeying”.

Too long is forever

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 It has been too long without you
 There has been too much time
 Worlds lie between us 
 As I pay for my crime
  
 My cell is my world 
 of four hard walls
 
 Spartan and bare
 
 My memory is my cell forever
 I keep seeing you there
  
 As each long 
 long day passes .....
 
 My sentence every minute

 Gives way to darkness
 My loss lies within it
  
 When I look through my barred window
 I expect in some light
 To see you running towards me
 Again
 my mind at flight
  
 I pace I groan 
 squat in the corners 

 Of this tiny space

 Close and open my eyes 
 And still see your face
  
 I see you on the day as lovers we were wed
 I see you in the night on the matrimonial bed
 I see us on every outing all the things we did
 I see us laughing and loving as besotted kids
 I see your  auburn fringe and wavy locks
 I see your long legs above  bobby socks
 I see your bright blue eyes black long lashes
 I see your  olive skin the smile that flashes
 I feel you in my arms in the softest embrace
 I remember all your charms 
 I feel my disgrace
  
 Where is your world now my love 
 And is he there with you
 No I am not proud my love
 If I could bring you back I’d kiss you